Random stuff

I'm all hopped up on productivity, so I thought I'd write a blog post (no, my BFF is not instructing me to write a post...nope, not at all)

First, I'd like to tell you all about the beautiful start to my morning. In half-consciousness, I hear a BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP (annoying yet? Because it sure was annoying the heck out of me). First thought - am I dreaming? No. Second thought - phone alarm? I certainly didn't set one and it was just after 7am - too early for ShankRabbit to wake up. Third thought - Smoke/Carbon Monoxide detector? Ohholyjebus, I'M AWAKE I'M AWAKE! Turns out, that wasn't the source. There's nothing like a little jolt of adrenaline to get your butt out of bed.

After about an ETERNITY (morning speak for 2 minutes or so), the beeping stopped. Followed shortly thereafter by the sweet, dulcet tones of a jackhammer.
(I later figured out that the beeping must have been the reversing sound of their work truck.)

This was all forgiven when I spied the guy manning the jackhammer do Michael Jackson-like moves trying to evade a bee. Quite comical.

After dropping the dear husband off at work, I took the long way to get on the highway. I wait at the light for it to turn green. I proceed into the intersection, ready to make a left hand turn, and I am greeted with the sounds of screeching tires and smoke to my left. Apparently, Mr. Pays-no-attention-to-the-road was about to speed right on through the red light...right into my van (well, technically, he would clipped the back end of a different car first, then me). I was very proud that the only thing to come out of my mouth was a very loud "OH CRAP!" I tend to go for more, uh...colorful words in the car.

Although my morning is not something I'd like to recreate, I'm more awake now that if I drank a whole pot of coffee. Let's give it up for adrenaline!

* * * * *

Joshua Radin just came up on my Pandora station. I'm happy-dancing in my seat right now.

* * * * *

I took Peanut to the Westown farmer's market yesterday. In addition to chasing pigeons and stopping to watch a juggler perform, she got a chance to bust-a-move to some live music. It was a lot more fun of a farmer's market than I'm used to - though my usual stop has more of a selection.
If it wasn't for the sticky heat and evil eyes from other mommys (apparently I was sitting a little too close to this mommy-groupmember's unmanned stroller. Hey lady, if you're going whisper and shoot glares for getting too close to your purse, then here's a thought: put it over your freaking shoulder and not hanging off the handle of your stroller! Didn't anyone ever tell you that if you make that face too much it might stay that way? Perpetually angry gofer is not a good look on you), we would have stayed longer.

* * * * *

Big, big changes around the corner. Lots of stuff to think about that I'm sure I'll share with you all soon.

Definitions from a Catholic dictionary

I'm going to bypass an actual "what I've been up to" post, because...well, there is an office/workspace to be cleaned with my name on it. And if I don't clean the space, I can't sew. And I'm so excited about my next projects I literally skipped to the car after purchasing the necessary tools. Fortunately, I could pass the skipping off as "entertaining my daughter" so I didn't look so much like a freak. You know, more than normal.

So, in honor of bypassing a real update, I thought I'd share a little religious humor I found in an old email-

Definitions from a Catholic Dictionary

Amen: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows
Bulletin: Your receipt for attending Mass
Hymn: A song of praise, usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range
Choir: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the congregation to lip-sync
Holy Water: A liquid whose chemical composition is H2OLY
Incense: Holy smoke!
Jesuits: An order of priests known for their ability to find colleges with good basketball teams
Jonah: The original "JAWS" story
Justice: When kids have kids of their own
Kyrie: The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize besides gyros and baklava
Magi: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower
Manger:
1. Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't covered by an HMO
2. The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough
Pew: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches
Procession: The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and the late parishioners looking for seats
Recessional: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass - led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot
Recessional Hymn: The last song at Mass, often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left
Relics: People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel and stand without prompt
Ten Commandments: The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman
Ushers: the only people in the parish who don't know the seating capacity of a pew

It's all about perspective

Our 15 month checkup for Peanut was rather uneventful. Yeah, she got a few shots at the end, but nothing her binky and a sticker couldn't soothe.
(and for those interested in her percentile range, it goes as follows - weight: 75%, height: 80%, head circumference: 95-97%...all still trending the same as it did when she was 2 months old. We gots a big kid!)

As I was sitting with the doctor discussing her current milestones, Peanut ran around the exam room, chatting away. She stopped me at one point and asked, "how many words does she know?! I think I've heard at least half a dozen!" I said, "I guess we've never really counted them before...uh [trying to think quickly] 15-20, maybe? Who knows." She responded with "wow, we expect about 3-5 words at this point. So, I don't think I need to tell you that she's doing really well. She's at a 2 year old level with her vocabulary."

Now, I am not saying this to rub it in anyone's face. I had to share this because...well, before this appointment we were a little concerned about her vocabulary. Not enough to send up red flags, but we thought she should be farther along. We had no idea where a 15 month old was supposed to "be" as we don't read those milestone charts you are bombarded with when you have a kid. We know if there was anything to be concerned about, the pediatrician would be quick to let us know.

Once this was brought to my attention, I started thinking about our daily interactions. And it hit me - she really does talk a lot (with and without purpose. She still babbles like the crazy cat lady on the Simpsons, but uses words all the time). A few examples:

While running around the house, "Da Daaaa! Weh are yoooou?"
When asked what she would like for lunch, "Hmmm...(goes to fridge and waits for you to open it up) - hot dog!"
Upon hearing a crying baby down the hall in the doctor's office: "Awww, baby..."
My personal favorite: When she wants up, she'll say "up!" When she wants down, she'll say, "up down!"

We have full conversations. She tells me what she wants and doesn't want. She understands what we tell her and will respond accordingly.

When you live it everyday, you just don't notice...

I need sewing help!

Ok, I'm bringing my request to the masses...maybe you (or someone you know) can answer?

As you know, I have a very basic (but very nice) Kenmore Mini Ultra. And I'm asking it to do a very simple task: sew on knit and jersey fabrics.

My sewing machine does not like it. AT ALL. It skips stitches, eats the fabric, moans like a dying whale...

I have tried every goshdarned combination of solutions to (what seems like) a very simple problem - ball point needles, changing tension, interfacing, synthetic thread...nothing is working.

Can anyone help?

I get it...I'm not a young'un anymore

I went out last night. Normally, not something I would consider notable...except when I go out in Chicago. At 9:30pm. And lose track of time. And have to drive home afterward.

I'm exhausted, but surprisingly alert. I hope to have a big freakin' nap post up later detailing the events of last night.

Oh, in addition to my obvious sleep deprivation, Peanut has a doctor's appointment today and will receive her 15 month shots (shot? Shots? I'm not sure how many. All I know is that MMR is on the list. Fun times). For the first time in her life, daddy won't be there to hold her down hold her hand while she gets her shots. That part will be played by the understudy - me.

And here we go...

A question

Short and simple:

For the last couple years, ShankRabbit's shaving cream came from H2O+ (the body butter is amazing! Works well to curb pregnancy itchy skin). This was the only product that did not irritate his sensitive skin (and it smelled good - an important factor for me). Sadly, they have discontinued this product...so we are on the search again.

Do you have any recommendations? Preferably something that costs less than a lobotomy.

Thanks!

Random Wednesday

The past few weeks have been...life.
I don't know how else to describe them other that. There have been ups (how can you not enjoy a perfect sunny day?), there have been downs...but that's life. You know?

* * * * *
I woke up this morning to the wonderful sounds of Peanut who, upon seeing me round the corner, took out her binky just long enough to sign for "food." A whole banana, a piece of toast, and half a bowl of cereal (adult-size...as this was originally my breakfast) later, she was finally full. A mere 2 hours later, she wanted a snack. Hmm...can we say growth spurt?

* * * * *
I wrote up a post about someone I was not very happy with...but in the end, decided not to publish it (I'm certainly glad I got it out...even if no one will read it). Since I don't want to leave you wondering who is ruffling my feathers (it's not an easy feat), I will share this little bit with my readers...
My father's side of the family INVENTED manipulation and guilt trips. I can hear one comin' a mile away. So, if your intention is to have me emotionally check-out with you and doubt your words/actions, then by all means...send one my way. I'll point to center field and knock it out of the park every time.

* * * * *
I had very painful deja-vu this morning. I was just sitting on our couch, sipping my coffee, watching Sesame Street with Peanut when I shifted my position ever-so-slightly - resulting in throwing out my neck/back. Again. Same time of day, same situation, same debilitating pain.

* * * * *
To all the people getting ready for BlogHer: I wish everyone good weather and safe travels.

A word tour of our home

"Hi, welcome to our home! We're so glad you could join us. Here, let me take your coat.
If you would, please leave your shoes by the door. It's not that we're clean freaks - Peanut loves to eat soil and any interesting finds on the floor. Thanks.

Would you like a tour?

This is our living room. No, we do not decorate with Tupperware containers and measuring spoons. Our child just loves to play with those. Be mindful of where you sit - you don't want a kitchen utensil where the sun don't shine! Hahahaha...heh...wooo...moving on.

This would be our dining room. I know that most dining rooms have...oh, what do you call it...furniture in them. But we're minimalists. We like to think the absence of furniture in here will make our house seem bigger. In reality, it provides more floor space for Peanut to leave her toys. And for us to have dance parties. Who needs to eat?

And now we have made our way into the kitchen. We spend most of our time in this room, as you can see by the dishes and stuff on the counter.
Isn't our fridge "festive?" Peanut loves to decorate the fridge with handprints and slobber. Oh, and take note of which letters of the alphabet are on the fridge - the other 22 will be underfoot during this tour. Think of it like a scavenger hunt!

We can skip our rooms and the bathroom. The only thing of interest in any of those is our family photo - which can be found on the floor of the bathroom. Our daughter has quite the design sense, doesn't she?

Oh, you're leaving so soon? But you haven't seen our toy-riddled TV room yet! Well, if you must, you must...

Thanks for stopping by! "

A cop out

It's not that I've been lacking material for blogging, I just lack the motivation. I get 1/2-3/4 of the way through a post and I put it on the shelf for later. I run out of steam and can't seem to get the post right where I want it.

So, while I've spent the last hour technically blogging, you are going to get this meme post ...because it's a heck of a lot more interesting than the drivel I just wrote. Trust me.

Movie Meme

1. A movie that made you laugh: The first one off the top of my head would be Drop Dead Gorgeous. Stupid, yes...but funny.

2. A movie that made you cry: So, so many...but again, the first to come to mind is What Dreams May Come. I think I cried from beginning to end.

3. A movie you loved when you were a child: The Little Mermaid. I used to watch the VHS tape at least 4 times a day when I was little. Kids these days don't know what it's like to wait for something to rewind. Excruciating for an 8 year old, I tell ya.

4. A movie you’ve seen more than once: A lot.

5. One movie you loved, but were embarrassed to admit it: Oy. George of the Jungle (with Brendan Frasier). Mostly because of this dance scene (starts at about 5:10 into the clip). If you're not into seeing half-naked dancing men...then don't click.

6. One movie you hated: I can't think of any that I said I absolutely hated...maybe Mr. Wrong. That was just weird.

7. One movie that scared you: The Grudge. I hate scary movies. I don't know what I was thinking.

8. One movie that bored you: Darjeeling Limited. We turned it off about a third of the way through the movie. Apparently, we stopped it just as it was getting good. I have yet to try this movie again.

9. One movie that made you happy: Enchanted

10. One movie that made you miserable: Well, any movie that makes me cry a majority of the time will do that (see answer to number 2). Although there was a movie I didn't make it through because I was an emotional wreck - Fluke.

11. One movie you weren’t brave enough to see: 90% of scary movies

12. One movie character you’ve fallen in love with: I can't say I've fallen in love with a character. There are times I get so swept up in a performance that I care about them for the couple of hours they are on my screen, but no "falling in love."

13. The last movie you saw: ((checking netflix history)) That would be Forgetting Sarah Marshall. A lot funnier than anticipated.

14. The next movie you hope to see: the newest Harry Potter

How nature made me cry

The minivan story will be up soon...I have to wait for someone *cough, cough* ShankRabbit *cough* to finish writing. In the meantime, here is my story about nature:

It was a typical Wednesday. I had just dropped off ShankRabbit at work, and Peanut and I were heading back home. A few miles away from the house I remembered that I wanted to stop by the bank. I decided to take Highway 100 all the way there (for those non-Milwaukeeans, Hwy 100 is a six lane road. Fairly busy any time of the day). Oddly, not a lot of traffic on the road, "Cool!" I thought. As we were coming up over a bridge, I notice a few cars had stopped or slowed down. I then spied a mother duck and her (8-10?) ducklings crossing the road. They were already in the far right lane (and I was in the middle) so I was able to pass them with no incident. But, my heart got the better of me and I pulled into the right lane, just ahead of them, and turned on my blinkers. A guy in a pick-up truck did the same thing, only he stayed behind the group. So, between our two vehicles, the ducks would be safe.



There was only one other problem - about 5 of the ducklings were unable to make the jump from the road up to the sidewalk. I got out and tried to offer them a makeshift ramp (a book I found in the car), but they were too scared of me. So, I sat in my car and waited. It took about 5 minutes, but they found a crack in the curb they could leap through, rejoining their mother and the other ducklings. SUCCESS! Now, they were all safely on the sidewalk, but next to a (typically) really busy road, about to head over a large bridge. Oy.

Knowing that this mama duck was looking for a nearby water source (and not knowing how close that would be, or how many other streets she'd have to cross) I called the Wisconsin Humane Society's wildlife rescue department and explained the situation. They agreed to look into it.

Now, you're probably thinking, "how did this make you cry?"

Well, just as I was about to leave the spot where I stopped (thank goodness traffic was fairly non-existent), I noticed something in the middle of the road - a duckling that wasn't quite fast enough for traffic, lying in the middle of the street. Mutilated by the continual passing of cars.

Something about seeing that dead duckling, after helping the others, just made my heart sink.


Thanks nature, for making me cry.

Patience

I am working on a new blog layout, so in the meantime you may see some wonky lookin' stuff. Sorry.

(and let me state for the record that I hate all the unnecessary spacing Blogger adds above and below photos. Ugh!)

DIY car seat strap covers

My child has a wonderful car seat. Unfortunately, the straps irritate the side of her neck when she falls asleep (especially if she's wearing a tank top or short sleeve shirt). I knew I needed to do something before we spend 6+ hours in the car on Friday.

Now, some brilliant person has already created the concept of the "car seat strap cover," but what fun is buying some when you can make your own?

Here are my instructions on how to Make Your Own Car Seat Strap Covers
I apologize ahead of time for some of the photos...my camera battery died in the middle of production and I had to use my phone for the rest.

You will need:
fabric - I chose a soft "minky" fabric for the outside and a plain ol' boring cotton fabric for the inside.
Velcro
(optional) Batting or some other stuffing-type material (polyfil, cotton, scrap fabric, the neighbor's cat...)

1. Measure your car seat straps above the clip, length and width (IMPORTANT: be sure the clip is in the appropriate place your child wears it. You do not want the cover impeding the proper use of the car seat straps).

My strap width was about 1.75" - I rounded this up to 2" (I call this the "Isabella factor" - gives me room to make a mistake with no real harm to the project) and added an extra inch to accommodate the Velcro.

On the length - I added only a 1/2" to accommodate the seams (no room for error on this one - yipe!)

No, I did not embroider some weird arrow motif on her seat belt. Those arrows indicate where to measure.




2. If your fabric has an obvious directionality (like this godforsaken lovely choice I made), decide which way you want it to lay as a final product. Also, it is a good idea to do test runs on a scrap piece of fabric to figure out the correct tension for this project (if your machine does this automatically...then I hate you).





3. Cut out 2 pieces of the cover fabric and 2 pieces of the underside fabric.

See that pizza cutter-looking thing? That's my new rotary cutter. *swoon*

















4. Pin fabric, right sides together and sew, leaving an opening on one side (for turning).

Who uses a white pin on white fabric? Really...


















5. Clip the corners (it will make the corners less clumpy) and turn your fabric right side out.









Now, onto velcro...

6a. Attach Velcro pieces to each of the long sides (on the underside fabric).

To each his own when it comes to exactly how to attach the Velcro...if you've got a tried and true way to do it, then go for it. I personally did a basting stitch down the middle (red arrow) then went back and stitched around the outside (removing the basting afterward).

Note: I decided to put the Velcro in such a way so when closed it would be more like a clam-shell around the belt and not looped around to the underside of the belt. I didn't want unnecessary bulk under the belt, both for safety and comfort reasons.


Ah, my seam ripper. We have such a love-hate relationship, as you will see later on.










6b. Remember when I told you to do a scrap test for tension? Well, I didn't (do as I say, not as I do). It took three tries and a lot of hand cranking to get that friggin' lovely Velcro attached to the project.

(Behold! The Blur of Frustration!)

(Everyone, this is Betty. Betty - everyone)




6c. Don't get in a fight with your seam ripper. He will always win.



Ow.






7. Originally, I decided against doing any kind of filling because the fabric was plush enough not to need it. However, I thought a thin layer of batting might make things a little more comfy for the slumbering child. So, this part is completely optional - especially if you are using a wonderfully soft, plush fabric for the outside.

Note: I did not secure the batting to the project in any way. Yes, I realize the "afterthought" batting will eventually shift and clump after washing a few times. I can always open it up, replace it, and tack it down in some way. No biggie.
(Eeeew. My nails look gross. Gotta do something about that...)

8. Stitch the openings closed.











9. Hey look...the *grumble, grumble* Velcro works!












10. All done and ready to use!

A preview of posts to come

A list is needed. There is just so much ready to come flying out of my brain:

- A tutorial (of sorts) on car seat strap covers

- How aesthetics ruined my wrist forever

- People and their words (or - How a Punch in the Face Wouldn't Be Enough...)

- My true thoughts on having another one

Tools of the trade

I've been trying to formulate a complete thought about my new purchase, but it keeps coming out like...

OMGI'mflippin'excitedgotnewsewingtoolsWEEEEE!

Translation: Went to the fabric store yesterday. Got a rotary cutter, mat and ruler. It's a relatively inexpensive purchase, but it makes such a difference. Seriously. I don't know why I didn't get one sooner.

Ahhh...I love it.

So, if you don't hear from me for a while, it's because I'm buried under a pile of perfectly cut pieces of fabric (or I've been horribly injured in a drinking-and-quilting accident...which is more plausible).

Something has been bothering me

When I first created this blog, I made the decision to allow "anonymous" comments. My thinking was that anyone (in particular family and friends) could leave comments on my blog posts without having to create a Google account, if they didn't already have one. Unfortunately, this has not been the case. The couple of anonymous (which I shall keep in quotes because, really... you are never anonymous online) comments I have received were from people who felt it necessary to spew their ignorance on my site. So, even though ShankRabbit loves responding to these "anonymous" comments (and I loved reading it), I've decided to get rid of this option.

So, in a completely related tangent/rant, here I go...

If you are going to make a comment - whether online or in real life -

Own what you say

Plain and simple.

Some additional thoughts:

- I welcome other people's opinions. Many times I learn a great deal about the topic at hand through the other person's words...other times I discover more about my side of the argument. All I ask is for you to be educated about what you say - do your homework.

- I hate the phrase "no offense." Plain and simple: If you didn't mean it, you wouldn't have said it. And if you inadvertently offended someone with your words: a) apologize and b) choose your words better next time.

phew.

That feels better. Now, onward!

That is one ugly rainbow

It may not be pretty, but it's true...
(thank you for sharing the link, Scriptor Senex)

Your rainbow is intensely shaded brown, yellow, and white.

What is says about you: You are a deep thinking person. You appreciate quiet moments. People depend on you to make them feel secure. You're good at getting people to like you.

Find the colors of your rainbow at spacefem.com.

Cake or death?

I've talked before about my general dislike for any kind of bug in the house. We had our issue with spiders, silverfish (though, if it's anything like last summer, this will only get worse), and the occasional odd bug here and there. It's an old house, what can ya do?

My husband, the keeper of my sanity and "do it yourself-er" extraordinaire, got a pest control product for me us last weekend. We have yet to try it out, but I'll let you know how it works.

--

So, while I'm daydreaming about someday being able to relax in our TV room and not have a silverfish fall on me (ew. ew. EW!), I notice a strange dead spot in the landscaping on the side of the house. At first we thought it was damaged from the bad rainstorm we had a week or so ago, but upon further inspection, it's an ant colony. A LARGE ant colony.

After surveying the rest of the property (it's not big, so it didn't take long), we noticed at least three other areas of the yard where the little buggers have destroyed the grass and set up shop.

Now, I've said before that I don't mind bugs when they stay on their own turf (read: outside)...but this is excessive. They are destroying the lawn and creating more work for me in trying to keep Peanut from smashing and playing with ants (good thing she hasn't taken to eating them...yet...).

I asked the Google gods how I could get rid of an ant problem without going chemical-crazy. Of course, it returned a lot of answers. I'm not sure how effective these are, but here are a couple I found interesting:

- Sprinkle grits or Cream of Wheat around their colony. They will eat it and eventually die of starvation (it expands and they can't digest it).

- Pour a few gallons of boiling water directly over the colony.

Geez. I'm not trying to extract top secret information from them; I just want them to leave. Do I have to resort to torture?

I know, I know, they are just ants. But doesn't this seem...extreme? I guess it's better than sprinkling chemical death on their abode. And I'm sure politely asking them to take their business elsewhere won't work either. Though, maybe if I asked the queen herself...

Quick Thursday Update

Me - still injured
Daughter - napping
Husband - working from home (because of injured wife)

I'll update more when I can move a bit more.

I spoke too soon

How many times have you said or thought:

I spoke too soon...

Situations like this happen WAY too often for me.

Case in point: I posted a picture on Twitter of my wrist brace with the statement "how I spell relief" (old repetitive motion injury + caring for 2 children yesterday = P.A.I.N.). I was sitting in our TV room thinking how wonderful this new wrist brace is and how I am feeling pretty good today (even with a crappy night of sleep). And here is where the phrase comes in...

because at that very moment, after merely shifting my position on the couch, I wrenched my neck so bad that I crumbled to the floor. The pain began at the base of my skull and radiated down my arm (of course the same one with the wrist brace on it...because the wrist issue wasn't enough already).

After the tears subsided a couple minutes, I called the "King of All Remedies" (also known as ShankRabbit) and asked him what I should do to fix this. He gave me a list of things to do and told me to call him if it doesn't get any better.

So here I sit - well-stretched, medicated, hydrated, 'vitamined' with a heating pad on my neck.

And I'm going to keep my mouth shut.


____________________________

And this footnote is for the brother-in-law: please shower your wife with thanks from me. The homemade heating pad she gave me for Christmas is my new best friend.

Maybe my thumb isn't so green after all...

Ugh.

Remember this post where I updated you on the progress of my first attempt with growing herbs? I was hopeful, excited, proud...

Well, I'm sad to say they all bit the dust. The first to go was the oregano (well, it was never really there) followed closely by the basil. I even bought another envelope of basil seeds and tried again. No go.
Today, I decided to toss in the towel on the cilantro and chives. There are sprouts, but they didn't get much farther than that.


Chives - they want to go back in the soil


Emo cilantro

Maybe I should just visit our local farmer's market and get seedlings. That way I'm only responsible for keeping it alive...no seed work required.