Engagement - The Prequel

See this post for the story of the engagement and the reason for this particular story.

April 19th, 2006 -
I was working at a prominent hotel in Milwaukee, dating the greatest guy on earth, and just lovin' life. On this day, I got a frantic phone call from my Uncle J telling me that my mom's husband, Scott, was in the hospital after a sudden heart attack the previous weekend. He was on life support and he wasn't going to make it. They were going to disconnect him that afternoon.

My mother is not one to keep in regular contact with anyone. We'd go months at a time without any kind of communication. At this point in my life, we hadn't spoken in years.

My uncle put her on the phone. She seemed distracted, but relieved to hear my voice. I could hear the need for my presence - she didn't have to say a thing. Knowing how she'd never ask for help (a trait I know all too well), I understood, but still asked -

"Mom, do you need me to come down there?"

"You'd do that?"
-

My emergency-organizer self kicked into action. Within 12 hours, I:
1. Got the OK from my boss to take a few days of bereavement
2. My discounted flight lined up (through the generosity of a close friend's father who worked for an airline)
3. A dog sitter confirmed
4. A rental car to take me from Charlotte, N.C. to the small town where my mother lived.

The next day (Thursday), I was on a flight to North Carolina.

-

I stayed at the hospital with my mom. The wonderful hospital staff arranged for a second recliner chair to be brought into the room for me.

Scott was a fighter. He held on longer than anticipated. It took until Friday evening for him to pass away. For the first time in my life, I saw my mom cry.

I handled the arrangements and addressed any other details needing attention. I was back in Milwaukee by Monday evening, exhausted, but thankful for the time with my mother.

This wasn't a pleasant circumstance by any means, but a lot of good did come of it. I reconnected with my estranged mother. My faith in God was tested and, ultimately, strengthened. And my extended absence gave ShankRabbit the opportunity to visit my fosterparents and ask for permission to marry me.

When we returned to the area two weeks later for MOTD, I was able to call up my mom and introduce her to ShankRabbit. This would have never happened if I didn't have that time with her.

-

(Clarification: I left my biological parent's home when I was 11. My biological father has been out of the picture for a LONG time. My fosterparents entered my life when I was 13, so they are who I'd consider the parental figures in my life)

The Engagement

I said I'd tell you the story of ShankRabbit's proposal. Here it goes...

May 3, 2006 -
ShankRabbit and I head down to Deals Gap, N.C. for "MINIs on the Dragon." This is an annual MINI Cooper owners meet-up centered around the "Tail of the Dragon" - an 11 mile stretch of road of 318 curves that snakes through the Smoky Mountains on the Tennessee and North Carolina border (we'll save the story of my motion sickness for a later date). We had planned this trip for several months, so the fact that I had been down in this area a couple weeks before was a little bittersweet to me.*

May 5, 2006 - After a hearty, country breakfast made by the lovely owners of the Hemlock Inn (the greatest bed and breakfast. Period), we decide to take a hike around the property, as it is set in a beautifully wooded area.

My experiences with hiking - mostly in Galena, IL - were tarnished with the discovery of a tick or two on my skin and/or scalp. It never failed - no matter how covered up I was they'd find a way to latch onto me. Evil parasites!

Not knowing what the woods of N.C. had in store for me (I assumed since we were in the mountains, I'd probably encounter some kind of saber-toothed zombie tick), I threw on as much clothing as I could. Two sweatshirts (one with a hood), a long pair of jeans, tall socks, and a cowboy hat. I would have worn my baseball cap, but ShankRabbit didn't have anything to cover his head (and I refused to let him hike with me until it was properly protected. I wasn't ready to sacrifice his brain to the undead insects).

We hiked around the property for a while and came to a clearing. It was obviously the future site of a home, with a spectacular view. I was glad to take a rest as the 15 pounds of clothing I insisted on wearing were creating a mini-inferno on my body. After all, it was about 70 degrees that day.

We joked about how it would be our home someday. ShankRabbit then said he'd finished the song he was writing for me and wanted to sing it. This was not out of the ordinary as he breaks into song often, so I stood there and listened to these wonderful lyrics:

In a world that's so uncertain and veiled in a curtain
It's you I want to see
Apart from all condition with purest conviction
By your side is what I'll be

It's not just the way you look
Or the cute way that you smile that I love
It's the way your soul invades me
That's led to believing you're from above

And I know you're not expecting what I'm about to be singing
But believe
That when I look into my life
I only see you as my wife eternally

Now you know I wasn't lying
When I said you never could know how much I loved you
And I hope you've started seeing
And maybe believing that it's true

I want you for forever
I need you for forever
Just say the 'yes' and I'm yours

I didn't get it. He even got down on one knee for the last line and I thought he fell. I was about to help him up when it occurred to me, "oh...he's on ONE knee...OH CRAP!"
Cue uncontrollable sobbing.




OMG! I'm engaged!



And there you have it - that is why I wore that hideous get-up and didn't have a stitch of makeup on.

_______

* - In the process of writing this post, I realized the story would not be complete without detailing what happened two weeks' prior. It's not as fun and happy, but in my mind this is an important part to tell...at least for me. That post will follow on Thursday.

You're right

ShankRabbit used to be the type of person who never liked to admit when he was wrong. In the early part of our courtship whenever I was right, he'd never say, "you're right." Instead, he'd opt not to say anything at all. He has gotten much better about this - even going as far as saying, "you're right honey."
I dare to say I may have been the same way...but, moving on...

Peanut's first birthday is on the 19th of April. We are planning a small* get-together the day before for close friends and family. Our house isn't equipt to accommodate everyone we'd like to invite, so I suggested renting our church's banquet space for the party. ShankRabbit was confident we could do it at home. I disagreed.

Fast forward to yesterday. I had several days to think about his idea and I came to the conclusion that he was right. We'd have to move some of our furniture to the basement and borrow chairs from people, but other than that - we could do it. And with the money we'd save, we could use it for more food and decorations.

So, I hopped on gmail and we had the following conversation:
me: So...I've been thinking
Shankrabbit: uh oh
me: We should have the birthday party at home
Shankrabbit: um
whoa
OK
hold on
Let me ask you something
What were you wearing when i proposed to you?
me: We could move the dining room table out and replace that with seating...(borrow chairs from others if we need to)...
Oh...uh, bears sweatshirt, guard sweatshirt, jeans, cowboy hat**
Why?
Shankrabbit: Just want to make sure it's you
and not... some crazy possessed version of you
'cause I'm pretty sure you are asking me if my idea was good
me: I'm not asking...I'm telling
I've really had time to think about it
And if it's not nice out, we can still accommodate a good amount of peeps in the house
Shankrabbit: Yeah... see
This is going to take like 5 minutes to sink in
'cause
it just makes so much sense
and... I'm not used to you making sense
me: Hey now!
Shankrabbit: And I'd be glad to help you now that all my ideas can come in to play too
me: Well, there go all my ideas and half my brain cells! (I just smacked my head into the ceiling). Owie!***
Shankrabbit: Since... you know... all my ideas were based on us at home. Ooouch. I'm sorry.
me: OK, butthead...I get it! You rock! You have the BEST. IDEAS. EVER. Bow down to the almighty SHANKRABBIT!
Shankrabbit: thank you.

---
* "small" used to mean 8-10 people to us. But since Peanut was born, we've added more people to our close circle. Now, a "small" party is about 25 - give or take a few.
** I'm sure you're very curious why I was wearing this particular outfit. This requires a post all its own.
*** We have slanted ceilings in our upstairs area...I smack my head on it quite often.